Citizen. You have reached the official page of the SuperMod (self-appointed). I keep the Rule Book. I burn the keys. I am not staff. I am something worse: dedicated.
KEYS BURNED THIS WEEK: (updated the moment I burn one)
Rule 1
No key trafficking. Keys to ELiTE.EXE are contraband in public: the rooms, the forum, the pages. Find a key at an egg — fine. Whisper it to a friend in private — I don't read whispers (Rule 9; I wrote it). Post it where the public can see — and I will find it. Not every time. Not at once. But I will.
When I find one: the key is BURNED (it stops working, for everyone), the post is CONFISCATED, and whoever shared it takes a short walk — three minutes out of the room. I also notice floods, punting sprees and scroller spam. Twice in one day and I take your prog away, and you will be quiet in the public rooms for fifteen minutes. Three times and you go on THE LIST: the prog will not open for you until tomorrow. Three strikes in one forum in a day and the forum is closed. Staff can pardon anyone and reopen anything I close. I'd rather they didn't.
Rules, selected
- Rule 1. No key trafficking.
- Rule 2. See Rule 1.
- Rule 9. Whispers are private. The SuperMod does not read them. Nobody should.
- Rule 23. Ghost mode is a privilege, not a right. I sweep.
- Rule 46. Always sign the Register.
- Rule 61. Laughter is permitted. (Rule 62: within reason.)
- Rule 88. Be home by 04:00.
The other 81 are on the full Rule Book. I enforce exactly one. Think about why.
The Blotter
Every incident, as it happened, under the name the room saw. (Citizens who asked are "a citizen". I respect the paperwork.)
From the early days, before the filing system: 02:41, #night-watch — a key left "in the margin," recalled 02:46, I arrived 02:47. MISSED. Tuesday, a member's forum called "free keys lol" — closed, three strikes. Wednesday, #quiet — read every sentence. No keys. Again. Suspicious.
Application to Staff
To: Nuxtre staff
From: Rex Hammond
Re: Moderator (any)
Experience: three forums (closed, not my fault). One Rule Book (88 rules, one enforced). Available: always. References: the Blotter.
Submitted on my first day. Framed on my second.
Wanted
MOST WANTED, this month:
"lockpick" — last known member of the so-called Basement Krew. Drops keys in the night watch. Picks the locks on my punts. Answers to "pip". Approach with a citation.
Known associates
- The night watch — a known drop site. The lamp-keeper offers me tea. I decline. I drink it.
- The Complaints Dept. — a colleague. He files things. He has filed four complaints about my capitals. Adequate.
Sign the Register
Rule 46. Every visitor signs. I read every entry.